Terms
Terms & Conditions is the third main and currently ongoing chapter of Flesh Kernel. Synopsis Fresh Corn Fresh Corn [1] is a somewhat humorous segment which acts as cold open for Terms & Conditions. While meant to be a parody for the great part, it is actually canonical and integral part of the plot of the chapter. Wilt and Anaïs are replaced by wacky, cheerful human personas Bill and Anna, stars of a confusing mixture of '90s sitcom and contemporary relatable webcomic called "Fresh Corn", which is supposed to supersede Flesh Kernel (the comic) as an edgier and more easily digestible product. Even Glo makes an appearance on set as "Personified Allegory of Anxiety" covered in monochrome static. She appears to be scanning oozing holes. "Anxiety" informs "Anna" that she is being an "early bird" and alleges that Anna is "not real". In the meantime, neighbour "Gary" (Gnrth) stops by the house to ask for an egg. Slapstick ensues as the egg is actually cracked in Billy's face - but soon gives way to horror as Wilt's fear of suffocation is triggered. It's revealed that "Fresh Corn" was but Wilt's feverish nightmare induced by a drug bender, though Glo's presence in it remains mysterious. Terms & Conditions (first half) Wilt awakens with no recollection of recent events [2]. Pieceing together available data he comes to understand he's been spending the night in an Europium den having sex with a stranger and binging on drugs. Still in the den he stumbles upon Anaïs guarding a soundly-sleeping Glo [4]. Wilt learns that the three of them were performing some kind of task or procedure that he cannot remember anymore. An explanation is cut short after the den's owner (a corpulent Slime Person) confronts Wilt over unpaid debt. The altercation escalates and Wilt's Cranial Gland extends and kills the owner [5]. The other patrons panic, assuming Wilt is a Grey or somewhat related. Wilt and Anaïs thus decide to escape, carrying still asleep Glo, quickly before the authorities are alerted, which they are anyway almost immediately. Sneaking out of the establishment, they are intercepted by two policemen. They soon recognise Wilt as an infamous wanted criminal with a significant reward; one of them kills his partner to secure the entire sum for himself. Wilt makes use of the distraction to separate from Anaïs and Glo and run [7]. He manages to escape the policeman by jumping over a barrier which however leads to a very high drop - it's revealed the den is located in one of the highest points in Ur. Doomed to die, he's saved by Gnrth, who manages to break his fall by possessing a nearby couple driving a saucer. He makes his way through the ground level labyrinth of the city, while Gnrth harrasses and tortures him psychologically. Gnrth shortly disappears as soon as Wilt recognises and confronts Mystery Girl, who has been tailing him. She reveals knowledge of Wilt's real name (Fergus) and advises him not to cross her. As soon as Wilt disengages Mystery Girl, Gnrth returns and resumes taunting and humiliating Wilt. Gnrth's objective appears to be to confuse and frustrate Wilt as much as possible and prevent him from being able to reconstruct the events of the night and the way home. Wilt is unable to remember much except the sentence "the dark is nothing to be afraid of", which he cannot contextualise anyway, but he's able to find Glo's apartment thanks to a strange "tethering" feel onto his stomach. Nevertheless, Gnrth's suggestion that he use his influence and authority to take advantage sexually of Anaïs, a minor, angers Wilt to the point that - blinded by Gnrth's perceptual tampering - he ends up stabbing his own arm. Defeated and exhausted, Wilt begs Anaïs (which he mistakenly calls "Anna") to let him into the house. He discovers that what he felt "tethered" to was none other than Glo herself, which is still happily snoozing and now safe after Anaïs has gently carried her home. Dark Ocean The next segment tells the story of Xladislax Novaq̌, an alien scholar who, after a macabre epiphany about hidden connections produced by the sight of an eviscerated animal, began a systematic study of "subnatural" phenomena and discovered a sort of shared subconscious or underlying universal substrate which he calls the Dark Ocean. He presumes the Dark Ocean is difficult to navigate, but he finds that Greys are structurally designed to do so. It is revealed that "the dark is nothing to be afraid of" is his own quote, and that this segment is nothing but excerpts from Xladislax's book. He correctly posits that his death by execution by hand of the Reticulans is imminent. It turns out that the book is just what Glo was reading earlier that same night in her room. Thus, the rest of the chapter is shifted back in time and dedicated to explaining the events that led to the opening in Fresh Corn. Terms & Conditions (second half) Glo's reading is interrupted by Wilt and Anaïs suddenly entering her room. Wilt pushes Anaïs to reenact to Glo a monologue in which she recounts the "entire history of the world", in the broken form she was taught in school. The segment of Anaïs' version of the history of planet Earth is guest-illustrated by Nyamo. In the confused, semi-religious narrative, Earth was originally populated by the Damorran, who had a supposedly biblical relationship with the Greys. The Greys create Humans from monkeys as punishment for the irreverence of the Damorran. Overlapping the creation of humans with fall from grace is part of the Grey tactic to incite racism against humans in the Damorran. A barely recognisable version of the story of Jesus is also presented, in the form of a "Prophetess Jeetus" created by the Greys which is subsequently "double-crossed". Shocked at Anaïs' display of ignorance and Wilt's disregard, Glo takes it upon herself to correct the narrative and present a more realistic version of the facts. This segment is guest-illustrated by mermelada. Earth was indeed originally inhabited by humans, who were somewhat technologically advanced and possessed the means for long distance communications. The transmissions attract the Greys who place a Fathership (Fathership Alpha) in low-Earth orbit as far back as the 1930s. Sometime in the 21st century, Grey mind control induces world leaders into nuclear self-destruction of the human civilisation. Glo also implies that Greys subsequently established their colonial rule and imported alien species as slaves. The current year of 2345 is alluded to be separated from this invasion by roughly three centuries, in which Reticulan influence has corrupted storiographic records and manipulated culture. She also explains that the Reticulan Alistair MacDerrick, the Governor of Earth and owner of the largest harem in the fathership, is very likely Wilt's father. Wilt barges into present his own version of the "history of the world", which is of course an entirely self-centered fragmentary and unreliable autobiography. This segment is guest-illustrated by BenO, and appears to only map out a fraction of Wilt's adventures in space as a young(er) man. Wilt has apparently worked as a cabin boy on a ship whose name he misremembers as Arcturia, and disliked the captain. Subsequently, Wilt took control of the ship (and the captain's daughter), which led to a crash on a planet he can't name correctly, where he entered a drug cartel through a certain "Pedro". He lived on the cartel's "crack ship" working as an accountant for food and cigarettes. He then was imprisoned on Corniphax Beta. He also is aware of having been transfered at some point to a Grey jail, where he is shown to have been tortured by waterboarding, and that Mystery Girl was present as an observer. In dialogue, he is not able or not willing to recall this experience. Category:Flesh Kernel Category:Chapters